Posts Tagged ‘silly’

Paraprosdokians #3

Posted: April 8, 2019 in Humour, Life
Tags: , , ,

Regular readers – you know who you are – will know that we are particular fans of a very particular kind of joke called a Paraprosdokian.

paraprosdokian (/pærəprɒsˈdkiən/) is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence, phrase, or larger discourse is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect, sometimes producing an anticlimax. For this reason, it is extremely popular among comedians and satirists. Some paraprosdokians not only change the meaning of an early phrase, but they also play on the double meaning of a particular word, creating a form of syllepsis.

Anyhow, we came across a new bunch today, and they’re rather good:

You can lead a horse to water, but you’ll need help to drown it.

Too many cooks won’t fit in the broth.

A bird in the hand is a law suit waiting to happen.

Red sky at night, barn’s on fire.

Red sky in the morning, barn’s still on fire.

A fool and his money is good to go drinking with.

The lawnmower is mightier than the sward.

People in glass houses shouldn’t throw swinger’s parties.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single Internet search.

Just because you’re paranoid, doesn’t mean they’re not really out to get you.

Got any others you’d care to share, Dear Reader?

 

sub editorWe have been laid up with flu for a while, Dear Reader, hence our output has been somewhat slowed, but we couldn’t resist whipping out the trusty laptop for this one.

So Boston is where all those posh Universities are, right?

Clearly they are not sending many of their alumni to work in newspapers as sub editors – that interesting crew whose main job is to fact check, slash verbilicious copy (yes, we made that word up) and – crucially – add headlines to news stories.

We are delighted to see that this ambidextrous Oakland Athletic relief pitcher can pitch left handed, right handed, and, apparently, underwater, too. Quite some skill, that.

 

amphibious

 

You might also enjoy these:

http://wp.me/p1LY0z-1lC – best Sub Editing F*** Up so far this year boosts scout membership. Maybe.

http://wp.me/p1LY0z-zy – the girl’s school everyone apparently enjoys.

For other F*** Ups of all sorts from the world of media and advertising, just put F*** Up in the search box top left of this page, and enjoy.

More news as it comes to hand. And when we stop sneezing. Nurse, we’ll take that little pink pill now, please. And a drop of chicken soup, if you can hold the spoon to our trembling lips.

 

 

We only hope they’re ready for stiff competition.

 

Um.

Um.

 

When local water works closed streets to traffic, a pub sensibly decided to let customers know it was still open for business.

However, as this hilarious picture shows, it did not go exactly to plan.

As reported by the West Briton, its creator did not leave adequate space between the words ‘pen’ and ‘is’.

The sign has since been taken down from the pub, which is named after the local crown court. Nice looking spot for a pint, too.

 

wig-and-pen

 

To view our vast and growing collection of F*** Ups from the world of advertising, marketing, newspapers, packaging and a whole lot more, just put F*** Up in the search box top left. Enjoy.

OK, this is just very, very, very funny.

Do yourself a favour. Just don’t blame me if you spit your coffee on the keyboard.

Meanwhile, Ep 1 of the latest season is on today. Whoot!

Which one would you prefer, Sir? Left or right?

Which one would you prefer, Sir? Left or right?

 

Well, that’s the lad’s night in sorted, then. And all for under 25 quid.

We kew Essex girls were good value, but this is ridiculous.

 

I kinew the take away business was getting more competitive, but sheesh.

OK, so the take away business was getting more competitive, but sheesh. Strippers delivering your pizza? Really? (Come to think of it, that reminds us of a 1970s, er, ” movie” title.)

 

And hey – it’s not like a silly little SMS sent from an outlet in Southend is going to end up taking the piss out of our brand worldwide, is it?

For other glorious advertising, sub editing and packaging F*** Ups, just stick F*** Up in the search box top left. Enjoy.

The Daleks
Ok, there are some really, really really silly people in this world.

And occasionally they come up with absurdist humour. Now I don’t want to go all hi-falutin’ on you, but I do think we should have more absurdist work around to cheer us up. So do yourselves a favour and have a listen to this …

http://www.b3ta.com/links/Dalek_Relaxation_Tape

What I just really love is the way this combines Dr Who – surely one of the great British cultural icons – with another modern meme – the seemingly relentless production of meditation materials for all us stressed out modern people who can’t cope any more.

And you know what, it is not only laugh out loud funny, it’s also strangely soothing. Bizarre.

I originally published this last Easter, when I was going to do a long, serious piece about the deeper significance of Easter to us all, but I think this is just as meaningful, in it’s own nonsensical way. So now let me wish you all Merry Christmas, if you haven’t seen it before 🙂

Enjoy.

Thank you SO much – kisses! hugs! cocktails bought! – to my fellow copywriter Sabina Heggie who kindly thought to send me this.

http://tinyurl.com/95w3tgn

I mean, I actually was crying with laughter by the end. Just keep reading down to the product reviews at the bottom of the page or depending on what your browser does click on Customer Reviews.

Do it people, do it.

Warning: do not open link in a public place where cackling uncontrollably is an offence. Do not share with your Grandma or minors. You have been warned.

Well, Dear Reader, you know I am just a teensy bit obsessed with Mr Trololo. And then I saw this, courtesy of Patti’s Facebook page. Oh joy, oh frabjous day, yet once more. How do people have time to do this stuff? No idea. Well, I am just glad they do. Enjoy.

Then on an entirely different slant – if you have time and are feeling thoughtful, have a look at Stephen Fry a few years ago talking about the Roman Catholic Church. Now, I am not an atheist, and I am not especially anti Roman Catholicism – although I disagree with many things about the Roman church to be sure – but my God this is a great piece of public polemical speaking which deserves a wide audience.

I think God loves Stephen Fry. He certainly over-endowed him with grace.

Right, YouTube is just too damned addictive. And it’s dinner time. Pip pip.