Well, This Is What I Think

That sound you hear is the cracking and shattering into a million un-mendable pieces of millions of male hearts.

You think women worldwide came over all wistful or full-blown tragic when George Clooney went off the market?

That is nothing – nothing we tells ya – to the pain being felt at the news that Scarlett Johansson has got married again in secret.

Yes, sources have revealed that new mum Scarlett Johansson has secretly wed her fiancé Romain Dauriac. He is known from his role as an editor in the Clark, a French urban art magazine and recently his management role in a creative agency.

The couple – who welcomed their first daughter together, Rose, in September – set tongues wagging after they were both spotted with rings on their wedding fingers.

“Scarlett and Romain were married in a very intimate ceremony after the birth of their daughter. They kept the wedding a big secret because they both wanted privacy,” a source confirmed to the New York Post.

Although they were expected to wed in Roman’s home city, Paris, the source says they actually married in Scarlett’s native country, the United States. The star and her journalist beau first started dating in 2012 and became engaged in August 2013.

At the time, 30-year-old Scarlett said she wasn’t going to rush into marriage as she wanted to “enjoy and really savour” being engaged. That little window of hope has been keeping men going the world over. If only they could manage to accidentally-on-purpose be having a beer in the same bar as ScarJo one night, and manage to engage her in effortlessly witty banter while sucking their stomachs in, hey – well, anything could happen, right? Just don’t actually DO it, babe, till we’ve had a chance to talk, k?

She did it. It’s over.

The marriage is a first for Romain (also now known internationally as “You lucky, lucky bastard”) and a second for Scarlett who was previously wed to Ryan Reynolds from 2008 to 2011. ScarJo has admitted to being jealous and slightly insecure about Romain. Probably because he’s, you know … French.

We wish them luck. We just know they can’t understand us, seein’ as how we’re saying it through gritted teeth, an’ all.